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The loan of Ali Al Habsi to Wigan Athletic was seen as beneficial to all parties.  It gave the player a chance of first team football, eased the load on Bolton’s wage bill and provided Wigan with a goalkeeper who wasn’t:

a)    Always injured
b)    Crap

Yes, Chris Kirkland, that’s you we’re talking about.

However, there have been a couple of snags.  After being roundly thrashed by Blackpool and Chelsea, Roberto Martinez’s side were expected to go the same way at Spurs.  Instead they scored an unlikely victory and the big Omani stopper performed heroically to keep a clean sheet for the second time in five days.

Wigan.  Clean sheet.  Same paragraph.  Doesn’t compute does it?

Agent Al-Habsi appears to have misunderstood his instructions.  He was supposed to keep the result respectable, not stop the other lot scoring altogether.

Secondly, events at the Reebok on Sunday, have got some fans in a panic, frantically calling for Bolton’s reserve ‘keeper to be recalled.  Jussi Jaaskelainen will receive a three match ban for violent conduct after giving Roger Johnson what John McGinlay might have described as a ‘wee push’, albeit in a somewhat girly fashion.

Owen Coyle doesn’t agree and has already pledged his faith in Adam Bogdan.

‘I have belief in the lad, that is why we were able to let Ali Al-Habsi out on loan because I knew Adam was competent and ready to go in goal and he showed his qualities in this match,’  he said after Bogdan’s debut at Southampton.  It’s a view that was re-iterated in his Birmingham post-match interview.

Bogdan faces a tough time.  His first league start will be at Arsenal, followed by a visit to Aston Villa, where Bolton have conceded thirteen times in three matches.  Then there’s  a trip to Burnley, which may well be a feisty affair, with the town still mired in bitterness after Owen Coyle’s perceived treachery.  The young Hungarian has the ability to cope, provided nerves don’t kick in.

This is how to slap someone around on a football field

The problem will arise if something happens to Bogdan.  His understudy for those three games will be Rob Lainton, who is well regarded amongst the backroom staff, but completely untested at first team level.

In that eventuality the only option will be to recall Al-Habsi, which can’t happen if his move becomes permanent.  Jaaskelainen’s reaction on Sunday was viewed as a rush of blood to the gloves, but it may well have cost Bolton a sum in the region of £3 million.

So is this.

Click here to view the embedded video.

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It remains to be seen whether former Burnley manager Owen Coyle will make a success of his time at the Reebok, but another recruit from the poor relations in East Lancashire made a more immediate impact, as Bolton snatched an unlikely point against Birmingham City.

Player, shirt, grin, with zimmer frame cunningly concealed

Robbie Blake had done nothing, apart from look old, after he replaced Johan Elmander, but his free kick that gave the Whites a share of the points was a peach.  Ben Foster in the Birmingham goal couldn’t have been further from the ball if he’d been outside the stadium.

Five minutes into the second half things had looked grim for the home side, after Craig Gardner put Birmingham two up.  By this stage, they were down to ten men, Jussi Jaaskelainen having been sent off for bitch slapping Roger Johnson.  The incident will be a prime candidate for inclusion in a future instalment of Football’s Most Embarrassing Moments. That left Adam Bodan, wearing a shirt almost the exact colour of his hair to make a league debut under the most difficult of circumstances.

Johnson appeared to be at the centre of everything.  Early on he put the visitors ahead from a James McFadden cross, but was at fault when bundling Kevin Davies to the floor with twenty minutes remaining.  Davies coolly slotted the resulting penalty home.

Bolton huffed and puffed to little effect, a Johan Elmander effort being the closest thing to a chance, but they were rescued as referee Kevin Friend lived up to his name.  A clash between Gary Cahill and Barry Ferguson appeared to be six of one and half-a-dozen of the other, but a free kick was given to the home side just outside the penalty area, and Blake curled it brilliantly over the wall to give his new side a share of the spoils.

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It’s a disturbing thought isn’t it?  A ginger manager at the Reebok Stadium again.  Fortunately it’s not that ginger one, but another with thinning copper locks, namely Alex McLeish, whose Birmingham City side take on Bolton Wanderers this afternoon.

There’s another tenuous link with the Whites provided by bean-pole striker Nikola Zigic who signed for McLeish recently.  Sam Allardyce and Harry Redknapp watched the Serb as he played for Crvena Zvezda against Cork City back in 2006, with the possibility of recruiting him.  Sam’s thoughts aren’t recorded, but ‘Arry wasn’t impressed.

Not a Pretty Sight

‘I don’t think five million will buy him,’ advised Zigic’s agent after the game.

‘I know, I’m one of them,’ replied Bagpuss.

Birmingham were last season’s surprise package.  They were expected to struggle but survived comfortably, thanks to some stout organization and occasional last ditch defending.

So far the two sides have identical results, one draw, two wins and entrance to the next round of the Carling Cup.  The performances of Owen Coyle’s side have been patchy.  They were disjointed against Fulham and overrun in the first half at West Ham, before finishing as comfortable victors.  Yet the points tally so far is satisfactory.

Coyle has an almost full squad to pick from, bar Ivan Klasnic and Sean Davis, who was only kept on to keep the medical staff busy now that Ricardo Vaz Te has transferred to the treatment room at another club.

The defence is a worry and the midfield hasn’t gelled yet, although individually there seems to be potential there.  The most encouraging thing so far has been the improvement in Johan Elmander.  Let’s hope it’s not another false dawn.

The last game at the Reebok between these two ended in a 2-1 victory for the Whites, but as all parties involved had already booked their summer holidays, it has limited relevance.  Expect a tightly fought encounter with (optimistic hat on) Bolton running out the eventual winners.

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Bolton Wanderers have been drawn away to Championship relegation favourites Burnley in the third round of the Carling Cup.

Owen Coyle returns to the club he used as a stepping stone to much better things, but will take a team comprised of reserve and youth players as the competition is seen as distracting to a Premier League outfit.  Brian Laws, his counterpart at Turf Moor is expected to field a full strength side.

Laws, who guided two different clubs to relegation last season, may see the tie as something of a swan song, as he isn’t expected to last in the job past Christmas.  His team were crushed at Swansea this afternoon, leading to more pressure on the Clarets boss.

The tie will take place in the week commencing 20th September, and Burnley supporters are eagerly awaiting  Coyle’s visit, as it gives them a chance to pay tribute to a man who took them to the only spell in top flight football they’re ever likely to see.

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Ali-Al Habsi is a gifted player, but there’s logic in letting him leave…

It’s hard not to be amused by the situation at Wigan Athletic.   Getting pasted by Chelsea is a fate that’s befallen quite a few teams recently, but being on the wrong end of a 4-0 drubbing at home to Blackpool can only be classed as utter humiliation.  The Latics aren’t particularly significant, but the thought of their relegation has appeal.  It’ll be like getting rid of a tramp who’s been sleeping on the doorstep.

Now there’s another reason for Whites fans to look at the Premier League’s least fashionable club.  Bolton reserve goalkeeper Ali Al-Habsi is currently on loan at the Dave Whelan stadium, and rumour has it that Roberto Martinez wants to make the arrangement a permanent one.

'Why are sending me to Wigan? Why?..........

Al-Habsi has had the misfortune of being around at the same time as Jussi Jaaskelainen, one of the top flight’s most consistent performers.   The big Omani hasn’t let anyone down when called upon.  He gave a fine display at Bayern Munich in the UEFA cup and performed heroically at the end of the 2007-8 season, when Jaaskelainen was injured.

So getting rid would be folly, right?  Well, not necessarily.  Bolton have an embarrassment of riches when it comes to goal keepers and Adam Bogdan, who made his debut in the League Cup tie at Southampton may prove to be the best of them.

‘I have belief in the lad, that is why we were able to let Ali Al-Habsi out on loan because I knew Adam was competent and ready to go in goal and he showed his qualities in this match.’, said Owen Coyle in an interview after the game.

Regular reserve team watchers already know how good Bogdan is.  The Hungary under-21 international arrived in 2007 and it was clear even then that he was a cut above.  He’s big, a great all rounder and commands his area well.  Since then he’s had the benefit of Fred Barber’s coaching, and is now ready to make the step up.

It will be sad to see Al-Habsi go, but he deserves his chance at the top level, and he’s certainly an improvement on Kamikaze Kirkland, Wigan’s current incumbent.   The current bid, thought to be £1.5 million must be rejected, but if the pie-eaters get realistic with their valuation then Owen Coyle should do the deal.

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Can we play you every week Rob?…

Bolton visit West Ham at the weekend, where they’ll encounter a generous acquaintance.

At the recent World Cup, goalkeeper Rob Green deprived England of a much needed victory, with a comical gaffe.  This was no surprise to White’s fans.  They’ve enjoyed Green’s attention deficit disorder immensely over the past few years.  He’s good for at least three points a season – to Bolton that is.

Oops...

Ultimately, Green was rescued by his colleagues in the national side.  They were even more dismal than he was, including Matthew Upson, another who shouldn’t have been in South Africa, unless it was to have a gander at Table Top Mountain.

Making up the trio of undesirables is Tal Ben Haim, formerly a competent centre-half for the Wanderers.  Since leaving the Reebok, Ben Haim has failed at Chelsea, Manchester City, Sunderland and Portsmouth.  He put the blame for his mis-adventures at Stamford Bridge on someone else.

‘If I knew Avram Grant was going to be the coach I would have signed for another club. I knew nothing good would come for me with Grant as Chelsea coach,’ he moaned.

It must have been an unpleasant surprise when Ben-Haim joined Portsmouth, only to be followed by Grant a few weeks later.  Yet now he’s signed on loan for West Ham. Guess who the manager is? Maybe the Israeli has lost his mind as well as his ability.

Bolton go into this one, with six straight wins over the Hammers.  They’ve lost only once in twelve league games against Saturday’s opposition, a Carlos Tevez inspired affair, at the start of Sammy Lee’s ill fated tenure.

‘Who’s the midget in the suit?’ sang the home support.

The Wanderers were lacklustre against Fulham, West Ham had a disaster at Aston Villa.  Both sides need a win.  Which is probably why a draw is the likely result.

Enjoy.  Contains a few naughty (but very funny) words at the end.

Click here to view the embedded video.

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It’s often said that one shouldn’t use Wikipedia as a sole source of reference.   At least not if the intention is to write a serious article.  Happily, this piece has no such pretensions, so Wiki it is.

Gary's Gardening Efforts Haven't Met With Success...

Former Bolton manager Gary Megson appeared on TV at the weekend.  Despite warnings on this very site, a few Wanderers fans chose to tune in.  Others have foolishly watched various clips of the programme that are lying around on the internet.

This wasn’t necessary.  Everyone knew what he was going to say.  If the Ginger One was to be believed, Bolton were all but challenging for a Champions League place when he was unfairly placed on gardening leave.

Just to balance things up, here are a few snippets from that Wikipedia article, which cast Gaz in a slightly different role than the one as football saviour.

Norwich

‘Megson managed the Canaries for the remainder of the 1995-96 season, but was sacked at the end of the season’

Blackpool

‘Megson left at the end of the season.’

Stockport

‘Soon after he left Stockport by mutual consent.’

Stoke City

‘His tenure at the Britannia Stadium was brought to an end…’

West Brom

‘…on 26 October Megson was dismissed…’

Nottingham Forest

...but his taste in gnomes isn't bad

‘In terms of points they were nearer to the relegation zone than the playoff zone when he resigned in February 2006 after being put under a lot of pressure by the Forest fans.’

Leicester City

‘…he left Leicester on 24 October 2007, just 41 days and nine Football League Championship games after his appointment.’

Bolton Wanderers

‘On Wednesday 30 December 2009, Bolton announced that Megson had been relieved of his duties as manager with immediate effect.’

So there you have it, the managerial equivalent of Michael Ricketts, except that lard-arse was good once.

Now you might say it’s unfair to quote so selectively and that the full story isn’t being told.  You’d be correct.  But Gary Megson can have no complaints.  After all, he started it.

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A game between Bolton and Fulham was never likely to be a classic, this being the fifth 0-0 draw in ten fixtures between the sides at the Reebok.  Maybe that’s why only 20,352 turned up for the first game of the season.  Given the weather, there were more enjoyable things to do.

Expecting Owen Coyle to immediately transform Bolton’s dysfunctional game into something more dynamic would be foolish. He is after all, working mainly with the squad that his predecessor assembled in order to play dull football.  But more evidence that he’s moving in the right direction is required.

The centre back pairing coped easily with Bobby Zamora, but the defence as a whole is still too easy to get behind, particularly on the side that should be occupied by Gretar Steinsson.  Up front, the Whites were toothless, incapable of putting the opposition under sustained pressure.

The most damning criticism of Gary Megson, is that his players looked as if they were strangers to each other.  After a pre-season with Coyle and a whole host of friendly games, little progress has been made in that department.  Can we have some movement please?

A scoreless draw, against a side notoriously poor on their travels is not a satisfactory result (Fulham won one game and lost eleven away last season.)  Especially with a difficult September to come in which the points tally is likely to be zero.

Worse was to come for those Wanderers fans who tuned into Five Live on the way home where the BBC demonstrated their continuing contempt for Bolton by giving the match summariser’s gig to Stuart Hall.

Hall is many things, an irritating wanker being one of them, but he’s no football reporter.  The use of language is bad enough.  It reminds you of On Again, On Again, the song that Jake Thackray wrote about his wife.

‘…she is one of those women who
Will never use three or four words when a couple of thousand will easily do’

Belt Up Stuart. Forever.

But it’s Hall’s dodgy recall, that’s the killer.  He made snide remarks about Johan Elmander – at his brightest for some time,  but lavished praise on Kevin Davies, Martin Petrov and Lee-Chung Yong who were little better than passengers.

Davies was disinterested and wasteful in possession and Petrov had no end product, while Bolton’s favourite Korean import was so anonymous he could have been rechristened Lee Chung-Who?

Hall has his own personal clock museum.  It would be the ideal place to stash him once he’s been processed by the taxidermist, for he is the epitome of a man whose time has passed.

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Supporters of Bolton Wanderers will be alarmed to hear of a gruesome event that’s happening on Sunday 15th August.  Sky are prepared for a mass cancellation of subscriptions from the BL postcode area, and local TV repair shops are expecting to do a brisk trade when they re-open on Monday.

Police have also warned householders not to be alarmed if they find the normally placid man next door shinning up the drain pipe in order to rip down his satellite dish. On a positive note, housewives may find their other halves keener than usual to take the kids to the park or wash the car.

Not even a fellow ginge is pleased at the news

The reason for these bizarre happenings?  It’s down to the man who refuses to go away, or as a poster on another Wanderers site succinctly put it,  ‘the turd that won’t flush.’   At 11am, former boss Gary Megson will take to the screen on Goals On Sunday in order to ‘lift the lid on life at the Reebok’, as the publicity blurb has it

Megson will explain that Bolton were bottom of league below Derby when he joined, that he took them the furthest they’d ever been in Europe and how he rescued the club from relegation, not once, but twice.  He’ll also mention that the players were a great group of lads, but the fans were mean to him.  Not that it mattered, as they were pathetic, made mountains out of molehills and the criticism was like water off a duck’s back.

There.  Now you don’t need to put yourself through the trauma of watching it.

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